Tips for Creating Your Personal “Happy Space”
“Don’t Worry, Be Happy” the song says. Well, how does one really do that? Here are a few suggestions.
Make a Celebratory Visit
This is a special visit that celebrates what someone else means to you and what they have given to you. It is a joyous form of gratitude, which has been proven in studies to boost mood and health. Here’s how to do it: (1) sit down and write a thank-you letter to that special someone. Describe their qualities, such as courage, loyalty, kindness, wit, persistence. Then (2) do a “drop by”. Make an unscheduled visit that person, and read your heartfelt description.
Look at the Big Picture
Remember that you are an essential part of a very alive universe–no matter how tough your day or week or year might be. You are part of the greater whole, the weave of life and all of humanity. I personally believe in God. And that He has a plan for my life. I also believe that I don’t have the capacity to “know” everything. That’s His job, not mine. That takes a HUGE amount of pressure off. Perhaps it will for you as well.
You can take a more politically correct or culturally acceptable action as well: remind yourself of that feeling by looking up at the night sky, or going to a religious service where everybody joins hands and sings, or even volunteering. Your life has ups and downs, but embrace the large scale of all of life in its great diversity.
Be a Keeper of Meaning
Bring meaning to the lives of others by teaching them a special skill of yours–whether it’s a new language, a new recipe, how to sail, or simply how to listen and be a caring person. You have something unique to share.
Forgive Yourself
This is one of my biggest problems. When I look at the “wake” of my life, I see some really bad debris. I’ve made some pretty bad mistakes. We all have. Going over (and over) your missteps keeps you feeling disconnected and unloved. Here’s how to forgive yourself: Bring to mind an incident for which you were forgiven. Remember the good feelings and bask in them. With these feelings, if you believe in God, ask for forgiveness. Now, see yourself from the perspective of the good person you’ve become as a result of those mistakes. who loves you unconditionally. Would they judge you as harshly as you judge yourself?
Tune in to Those Around You
For one day, decide to be courteous to everybody in your path–even buoyantly so. Your neighbor, your mailman, a stranger at the coffee shop, a cashier, colleagues, and of course, friends. Greet them, ask how they are, hold a door, give a smile and a compliment. At the end of the day you’ll feel much happier, relaxed, and more connected.
Nurture Your Creativity
Everybody has some form of activity that gets the creative juices flowing. Find it! Make it happen! Creativity brings joy, and the personality trait most linked to creativity is being open to experience–trying new things, being open to fantasy, discovering new connections. Foster your creativity by listening to music, reading literature, and viewing art. Try a different approach to a familiar routine, anything that will get you in touch with your creative side, and with others in the process!
I try to practice these tips myself. It’s a lifelong process and not something that you can do once and then you’re done. But I will tell you that when I’m consistent. Life is wonderfully happy!
Enjoy your day!
Jim Herrera
